Existential Self-Doubt Moments in Life

I've been listening to a lot of Dave Gorman's podcasts recently and, at the end of each show, he has a feature called his 'favourite existential self-doubt moment of the week' and, since listening, I've noticed these moments cropping up frequently. They may not be exclusively existential self-doubts, but self-doubts nonetheless. And I've decided that sharing some of these might make a nice, less awkward warm-up before this blog gets fully underway and becomes an awkward-free zone.

These are just 2 that I experienced yesterday:

1. I was using my webcam and, like most webcams, it was delayed. Usually, as anyone who has ever used one will know, they're only delayed by a few seconds. However, mine was delayed by about 30 seconds and it was frustrating me. I kept closing and reopening the webcam software but it didn't make a difference. After about 3 minutes, I started to panic a little bit and I started to think that maybe, just maybe, what I was seeing on the webcam was happening in the present and that perhaps I was 30 seconds in the future, watching my present self, and I shouldn't be angry with the webcam for being slow but rather I should be patient and wait for my present self to catch up to my future self.

I realised about 5 minutes later that I was being an idiot and shut my computer down.

2. I was on the bus, looking out of the window, and I noticed that something was smudged on the window- something that looked a bit like an apple, complete with pips. Largely trying to ignore the filthy window, I carried on staring out of the window and people-watching– as I am one to do– but I noticed after a few minutes that my vision was blurry, which I put down to it being half 7 in the morning and me still being tired. After blinking and rubbing my eyes several times, the blurring refused to subside. I waited and in 5 minutes my vision still hadn't cleared , at which point I was starting to convince myself that I had an early onset of cataracts– at the age of 17.

It was only after 10 minutes that I remembered the window was dirty. This happened 3 times.